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Insights: The Money Trap April 13, 2010 |
HiThe Money TrapReaders of Insights are invited to share their comments and feedback on this newsletter, and topics of discussion, in a dedicated forum. Please post your feedback for other readers to view and comment on. We'd love to hear from you. Just click here. "Lack of money is no obstacle. Lack of an idea is an obstacle." - Ken Hakuta Welcome back from the Easter break. I hope you found it both refreshing and invigorating. I wonder what you spent time during the break doing - and thinking? One issue that may well have been playing on your mind during the break is that of money - and that's what I'd like to talk about today. Money... Is it the root of all evil - or the great enabler? Whichever way you prefer to look at it, I doubt you'd argue with the fact that it plays a huge role in our lives. And that's because it is the universal currency of exchange. Dreams - or bank account drainers? In a recent family discussion, it struck me why we humans place such significance on the availability of this exchange in creating the life we desire. My teenage daughter is in her first year of university studying social work. She recently left home and and needs to kit out her apartment. My young son is passionate about martial arts and has a burning desire to attend a Shaolin monk training school in China. My wife is really missing her mother, sister and brother who all emigrated to New Zealand some years back and would dearly love to go and visit them... and me? Well, I have prioritized replacing our king sized bed as I'm starting to feel the effects of a mattress that's no longer as supportive of my large frame as it used to be. Apart from that, I have some exciting business plans that I'd love to go ahead and put in place. On the face of it each of these things will require a fair amount of money to bring to fruition. Taken together, they will need a very substantial investment. Like so many people, I have come to appreciate that by constantly focusing on the money required to make one's desires a reality, the very things one so desired can become seriously tarnished. As every good financial adviser will tell you, it's important to 'cut your clothes according to your cloth'. But some people have little or no cloth to speak of and others have enough cloth to make a string bikini when what they really desire is a three piece suit! So the issue, for many, is not so much about budgeting wisely with one's money, as about having more to budget with. You need only ask people what's stopping them from reaching for their dreams. In nine cases out of ten, lack of sufficient money is cited as the single biggest obstacle standing in the way. Interesting, not so? "Hey, honey, who shrunk my dreams!" At the start of the New Insights life coaching programme, clients are encouraged to come up with one or more goals that they will work towards achieving with the help of their coach. When first asked to describe their dream lives, and the goals they would like to shoot for, most people are surprisingly restrained. The reason is that they make an immediate connection between what it is they'd love to do or have and the amount of money they think would be required to make that a reality. Then their logical minds kick in to remind them: "Don't be ridiculous, you could never get your hands on that kind of money" and the dream or goal is instantly downsized, often by a substantial factor! To overcome this natural restraint and get clients to reveal and feel their true dreams, New Insights coaches loosen the self-imposed boundaries by asking questions like this: "If you were a multi-millionaire and money was no object, how would you spend your days?" The money trap You see, money is a limiting factor for most of us because we allow it to be. Those of you who understand the Law of Attraction will know that you attract that which you consistently focus your thinking on. And because we are so used to superimposing - on our thoughts about what it is we truly want to be do and have - thoughts about lack of money, hey presto, we end up with a lack of money! That makes us more sceptical, sometimes downright cynical, about the practical attainability of our dreams and ambitions and they end up becoming even more of a distant hope as a result. You can see the classic 'self-fulfilling prophecy' at work here! I call it: the "Money Trap"! An opportunity mindset So what's the solution? It's simple really - but difficult to execute because of all the deeply entrenched and ingrained beliefs most of us have about money. The answer is to adopt what I call an 'opportunity mindset'. First and foremost this requires you to learn to dream without restriction. It takes some practice but after a while you can condition yourself to avoid thinking about money - or lack of it - whenever you think of the life you really desire. Use the vivid imagination that you were endowed with and allow yourself to 'feel', 'see' and 'smell' what it is like to live the life of your dreams, without letting anything hold you back! Secondly, you need to learn to tune into the many and varied opportunities that life provides to move you in the direction of your dreams. Allow your intuition to take the lead here. If something feels good or right, go with it. If it doesn't, don't! Thirdly, you need to learn to treat money as an enabling commodity, not as an end in itself. Fixate your thoughts on the life and lifestyle that you want to have - not on the money! You'll find that by consciously focusing on what it is you really desire (as opposed to what it is you do not have, or what you believe you lack) you'll start to become aware of opportunities that you may previously never have considered. As you exploit those opportunities that resonate with you, more opportunities - and more of that enabling stuff called money - will be attracted to you... ... and your dreams and desires will move closer to becoming a reality. Let me know what you think I'd love to get your thoughts on what I have written and hope you will post your comments in the Insights Forum using the link provided at the top of the page. Right now I'm working with a close friend and partner to explore ways to help people liberate themselves from the mindset that I call the Money Trap. We envisage developing a series of products and offers that will complement the great work that our certified coaches are doing to bring more people the joy of personal freedom, confidence and growth! As always... Warm regards - Bill.
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